我爱你 – Wo Ai Ni by S.H.E.
When it comes to picking those winning numbers for lotteries, Westerners tend to choose those with some personal significance.Birth dates, ages of their children and, of course, lucky numbers are all popular choices.In China, the importance of, and obsession with, specific numbers goes much deeper…
Here we try to uncover some of the mysteries.
People are prepared to spend quite a bit of money making sure of „favorable“ numbers.In 2000 December, a businessman in Xiamen paid more than $25,000 for a phone number ending with five 8s, because ba, the pronunciation of 8 in Chinese, sounds similar to that of fa, the Chinese character for „prosperity.“
The Chinese concept of numerology is shared with other cultures and is based on mystical as well as Taoist traditions, namely the I-Ching, or „Book of Changes.“
According to the Taoist tradition, odd numbers are considered to be male or yang; even numbers are feminine, or yin.
零 Zero: Represents nothingness, completion and God. It has no beginning and no end, but is infinite. Zero is symbolized by a circle.
一 One: Portends honor and leadership. And one also symbolizes something constant in the development of things. So when Chinese use numbers to start off idioms, phrases or sayings, the overwhelming first choice is the numeral one, used about four times as often as the next most popular.
二 Two: Stands for „doubling up.“ Being made up of 1 and 1, two is the number of co-operation, the balance between two opposite poles, yin and yang, man and woman. A very popular Chinese saying affirms that „Happiness comes in Twos.“
三 Three: allows all things to be possible. It is the number of luck and success.
It is also a spiritual number. According to the I-Ching, three stands for Heaven, Earth and Man. When Chinese bow to offer incense, it is always done three times.
四 Four: Four is the number of material order.
The geometrical shape of the number four represents the physical world, as is often found in architecture, a square base symbolizing ground contrasts with the round roof symbolizing the sky. This is believed to maintain a celestial and earthly balance.
五 Five: A very popular number in Chinese culture since it occupies the central position (one through nine) and also reflects the Five Elements Philosophy-water, gold, wood, fire and earth.
It is also associated with the five blessings wished upon families and individuals on auspicious occasions, namely long life, wealth, health, love of virtue and a natural death.
六 Six: Sounds similar to the word „wealth“ in Chinese, and therefore is considered very auspicious.
七 Seven: has always been a universally auspicious number, from the seven wonders of the world and seven deadly sins, to the seven-day week and seven hills of Rome. China is equally enchanted by the number. It sounds like „sure“ in Chinese. Buddhists believe in seven reincarnations and seven weeks of mourning following a death.
八 Eight: Sounds like „multiply“ in Chinese and is considered a fertile number.Geometrically, it is the octagon, two interlaced squares or the eight pointed bagua, avery auspicious shape often used in fengshui for protection.
九 Nine: Is the greatest of all primary numbers because it contains the qualities of all the others. It is complete in itself and needs no other number to complement it.Nine stands for the final state of completion, the ultimate fulfillment.
At one time it was considered the sole preserve of the emperor. If a courier made a robe with nine dragons on it, if found he would be sentenced to death along with all his families and relatives. The country was composed of nine continents with nine provinces.
However, in different dialects of China, numbers may take on different complexions.
For examples, in Cantonese the number two is fortunate, because it sounds similar to „easy“ in the dialect. Three is associated with living or giving birth, eight with prosperity, and nine with eternity or power.
Combinations of numbers are also prized for their punning references to good luck and prosperity, the two most important issues in the minds of many Cantonese.This belief that certain numbers bring good luck is often put into practice when naming businesses and clubs that hope to attract customers.
Yet numbers are not always considered lucky. The numeral four, pronounced si in bothe putonghua and Cantonese, sounds similar to the character for „death.“ Thus many people tried to choose a home or business phone number without a four.
by Claire Colvin
Men often get a bad rep for being closed-off when it comes to discussing feelings. Women, as we know, are able to talk for hours about hopes and dreams and feelings. If men seem less inclined to do so, it may be that they have good reason. I was surprised to read recently that one author claimed that revealing feelings is as uncomfortable for men as revealing our bodies is for women. It only happens in a place of trust, of intimacy. Anywhere less feels like a violation.
In an article for O, The Oprah Magazine, author W. Bruce Cameron wrote that ?as boys we [men] learn that any sign of vulnerability will mercilessly punished by our peers.? Women expect to be comforted in times of weakness, men often expect an attack. If you want the man in your life to open up to you more, he has to be able to trust you.
Revealing our true selves
Trust takes time and effort, is easily broken and hard to restore but if you?re willing to work at it the reward is the relationship you?ve always dreamed of. Trust allows both of you to reveal who you really are. In spite of all the tricks we use to try and impress someone in the early stages of dating, intimacy is founded on knowing and being known.
If you want the man in your life to be more open with you, prove that you are a safe place by being more open with him. Be honest with him and make sure he can trust your responses. Men are not mind-readers (and neither are women). If he asks you if you are happy and you say ?yes? don?t assume that he will know you didn?t mean it. Let your ?yes? mean yes.
There is a myth out there that if your man truly loves you he will instinctively know everything about you. It?s simply not true. If you are looking for intimacy, stop playing games. Let him know who you are and invite him to do the same. Give him the opportunity to make you happy. Most people in relationships ? both men and women ? would love to give their partners what they want if only they knew what it was.
Let him talk
He needs to know that you will hear him out. Understand that opening up about feelings does not come easily for many men. If he takes the chance to open up to you, hear him out. Resist the urge to comment on what he is saying until he?s done. Think of the times when you are telling him something and he wants to solve your problem right in the middle of your story. Remember how much you appreciate it when he lets you finish? Men appreciate that too.
Men and women both have a need to know that they are being listened to and genuinely heard. Simply taking the time to actively listen without speaking shows your partner that you value what he is saying. Knowing that you value this kind of conversation may help him open up more in the future. If it?s really hard for him, but he knows it?s really important to you he may be more willing to make the effort.
Be a safe place
Ask yourself this: are you a safe place for your partner?s weakness? If he tells you that he?s concerned about his job or doesn?t know how to fix the car or is worried about his parents how do you respond? If he takes the time to open up to you about his fears he needs to hear that you still respect him. Reassure him that you don?t doubt his abilities and that you aren?t going anywhere. If he?s telling you that a decision he made has gone wrong, this is not the time to say ?I told you so.? Tell him that you appreciate the strength it took to be honest with you. Men always like to hear about their strength and when they?re feeling vulnerable, it?s a particularly good time to mention it.
Whatever you say let him know that you are on his side and that you will guard his confidences. He needs to know that what he says to you stays with you. Lasting relationships are built on trust and trust has to stand the test of time. If there?s a chance that his revelations will be the topic of conversation at the next girl?s night out, you can?t blame him for clamming-up.
Trust doesn?t just naturally happen between two people, even if they love each other. It takes work and if you?ve been hurt in the past it can be especially difficult. Building trust takes time. You need to show your partner that you are trustworthy and that you trust him in return. If he knows that you will listen to him without judgement and will keep his secrets he?s much more likely to be willing to talk about those awkward feelings we women seem to like so much.
extracted from womentodaymagazine.com
Yan, i want to tell you something,
but i say it with the words of Barry White:
We got it together, didn’t we?
Nobody but you and me.
We got it together, baby.
My first, my last, my everything,
And the answer to all my dreams.
You’re my sun, my moon, my guiding star.
My kind of wonderful, that’s what you are.
I know there’s only, only one like you
There’s no way they could have made two.
You’re, you’re all I’m living for
Your love I’ll keep for evermore.
You’re the first, my last, my everything.
In you I’ve found so many things,
A love so new, only you could bring.
Can’t you see if you,
You’ll make me feel this way,
You’re like a first morning dew on a brand new day.
I see so many ways that I can love you,
‚Till the day I die….
You’re my reality, yet I’m lost in a dream.
You’re my first, my last, my everything.